On Being Accountable

I went in response to a revelation and set before them the gospel that I preach among the Gentiles. But I did this privately to those who seemed to be leaders, for fear that I was running or had run my race in vain.

Galatians 2:2

“Do you have any weaknesses?”, she asked me, looking me straight in the eye, unblinking.

I gave an uneasy giggle, trying to read her face. It was serious. Dead serious. All the joking and jabbing stopped here as Dr. Logan stared me down. Her pale face was framed with wiry strands of blond hair in need of a comb and her thin lips were pursed, unsmiling. It was hard to believe that this was the same person who minutes ago had been churning out one-liners a mile a second.

“Uhm… yeah…” I stuttered, my mind going into overdrive. Everyone has weaknesses, I thought. Is this a trick question?

A mere 24 hours before I had first met this wiry middle-aged lady as I sat at a desk poring over a poorly patient’s latest bloodwork. “Hi, I’m Dr. Logan,” she said, thrusting a sinewy hand in my direction, “Julie. I’m going to be your clinical supervisor for the next six months.”

Indeed I had been looking forward to meeting her for a couple of weeks now and here I was, finally in her office, for our first official encounter. The meeting had started with a quick and easy interrogation as she got a quick run-down of my medical training up to this point and a feel of what I wanted to achieve in this particular stint in geriatric medicine. She was easy to talk to, all nice and smiling, even jabbing the odd elbow in my direction every once in a while. But now, as she asked that question, her countenance had all but changed. And I felt it. This, here, was the question that mattered the most.

Indeed, like she had already noted, I have quite a bit of experience in clinical medicine and the best way she could help me to make the most of this posting was to know what my deficiencies are - how best she could help me along. And so she asked, “Do you have any weaknesses?” No, it wasn’t a trick question.

Mariam and I have recently had the pleasure of reading Paul’s terrific diatribe against the church at Galatia. In his letter he outlines how he became entrusted with the true gospel by revelation of Jesus Christ and how he preached it faithfully to the fledgling congregation. However, midway through his missionary sojourns in Asia Minor, Paul took a major detour to return to Jerusalem, the city where it all started - where the Jesus he preached was crucified and died. While there, he made no assumptions as to the truth of his own message but set it plainly, as he understood it, before the Church elders. His intention was to find out if indeed what he had been speaking was the true and complete gospel (Galatians 2:1-10).

Is it not wonderful that men like Paul, established as they were in the Word, would stop long enough to make themselves accountable to others? That they would seek to refine their message and become even better than they were? Is not that the purpose of having someone to whom one could turn - some person to hold you accountable?

In medicine it is prudent, if not vital, that while I remain in training, someone has the responsibility to see that I develop myself; that my weaknesses are identified and dealt with. Students have their professors and apprentices have their mentors. Oh, that we would have Christian men and women to whom we could turn and say, “I have a weakness…”.

A big thank you to all who have served this purpose for me through my life. You know yourselves. God bless you.

With love, Doosuur.